6 MESSAGES THAT DAMAGE SELF–ESTEEM

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UPSET-CHILDHere is a list of the most Dangerous Messages that Damage Your Child’s Self–Esteem:

  1. Threatening the child to leave them at home if they do not hurry up or when you are outside if you threaten to leave him/her there when child shows tantrums and doesn’t want to go back home. This develops insecurity in children & rather than solving the immediate small problem at hand, you are creating a monster of a problem.
  2. Frowning or sighing when your child wants to talk to you or ask you for something. Give them time, or if you are busy at that time, fix a time to discuss & make sure to honour this fixed time.
  3. Put down messages e.g. “You are good for nothing!” really damage self-esteem. Don’t exaggerate the charge.
  4. Accentuating the negatives of the child especially in front of others. Remember the golden rule: “Always criticize in Private & Compliment in Public.”
  5. Children who are abused (physical beating or sexual abuse) are more likely to suffer low self-esteem as adults. They have learned that they are of little value in themselves or just an object to be used/ abused.
  6. Other forms of abuse, like being heavily criticized or unfavorably compared to others can also lead to low self-esteem (e.g. “Why can’t you be more like your elder brother!”).
  7. Harsh words spoken to a child can resonate throughout their lifetime, as can words of encouragement! Words have the ability to elevate someone to their highest potential or shred their well-built self-esteem in seconds. “You are …” messages fall under this category. E.g. “You are lazy, untidy, naughty, a nuisance, coward, shy, etc.” Try avoiding them at all cost.
Have you anytime did any of the above? Then you would definitely want to know how to repair this damage. Read our blog article, “9 Ways to Improve Self–Esteem“.

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